Being a younger child in a large family, I often heard of the exciting adventures of my older brothers but was usually unable to participate. So was the case on a visit to our grandparents’ home. My eldest brothers found a room full of treasures in a forbidden part of his house - they told me about it but I never got to see it. My grandfather was a well known attorney with a general practice and a distinguished career. Over the years he had accumulated a number of collectibles and gifts. Some were art pieces, some were antiques, and some were made with precious metals or jewels.

My grandfather had remarried while his son, my father, was still a child. While growing up, all I happily understood was that I had an extra grandmother. It was not until after my grandfather’s death that I fully understood that he had another family: a step-family with step-sons and daughters-in-law and grandchildren.

At the time of my grandfather’s passing he had a number of possessions: real estate and personal items (including that room full of treasures). He had a will that gave most everything to his widow. Decisions to give particular possessions or properties to his two sons or his natural grandchildren were left to his widow, my step-grandmother. My step-grandmother’s sons went through my grandfather’s house and claimed collectibles, diplomas, jewelry, clothes, and other items of their liking. A few residual items were distributed to us grandchildren: a grooming set, a flip-top telephone directory, a well-used leather brief case, and a few suits. These items are now gone.

No mementoes and no treasures from the mysterious room were ever passed down through our family. Shortly after my step-grandmother’s passing, I saw one of my grandfather’s paintings in an auction catalog. Through a recent, but unsuccessful attempt to obtain my grandfather’s law school diploma, I learned that it was - and still is - stored in a box in the house of my step-grandmother’s son.

It is often the case that a step-family receives and benefits more from a decedent’s1 estate and the first-marriage family benefits less. It could be that it is the decedent’s intent not to benefit the first-marriage family. Often what is known about a decedent’s intent relating to who gets what, is only what is written into the will. Sentimental items, heirlooms and specific gifts will not be passed to the specific person or people intended unless these items are referred to or specified in the will. If the will says “give everything to my widow and she will distribute it to my offspring,” only the first five words will have an effect and the offspring may get nothing.
The message to anyone who is thinking of writing, rewriting, modifying or reviewing your will is this: In the end, the will maker (and later, the decedent) will leave behind memories and possessions with their family and friends. It is in the making of the will that you can write the history and legacy you will leave behind. When the gift received is a lens through which a descendent can view their ancestor, the value of that gift will far exceed the price, and the effect of the giving may last for generations.

1Decedent - one who passes away.

** Robert S. Meyring is an Emory-degreed attorney. He practices estate planning, litigation and related general practice matters serving all and Georgians as the offices of Robert S. Meyring, P.C., Attorney at Law. Robert is able to serve clients throughout Georgia through his website regardless of their location. Robert Meyring can be reached at  678-217-4369; email: info@willsquill.com . Please visit his site on the Web with postings of past articles and free, helpful information at http://www.willsquill.com